Thursday, March 26, 2009

In Times of Hurt

"There are those hearts, reader, that never mend again once they are broken. Or if they do mend, they heal themselves in a crooked and lopsided way, as if sewn together by a careless craftsman." - The Tale of Despereaux

Hearts break, and people fall. Of course, the one that has had their heart broken are the ones that fall so quickly. Maybe it's because of an attachment, or maybe it's just because of they way they looked when doing it. When a person says they're sorry, they usually show some sort of emotion, along the lines of sadness, regret... But when a person shows nothing... That's when it hurts the most.
And then they try to pass off their confusion and lack of sympathy as you trying to blame them. Even though you should, but you won't. They get defensive and tell you that you should not be telling them what they are and are not. But it's how you felt. They told you how they felt, so why can you not tell them your side? Yes it hurts, but everything hurts. If it was a day, a week, a month, a year... They all hurt.
And then... not knowing what to say... Hurts most of all. What do you do? Stay friends? Become enemies? Maybe neither. Your head tells you to hate them, but your heart tells you otherwise. So which do you listen to? Head, or heart? In times like these, in hurt times, it's hard to choose which one to listen to.
But you're tired of all this. You're tired of hurt, pain, loneliness, regret... You're tired of not sleeping, of the guilt, of the heartbreak.... And you don't want to deal with it anymore, but it's life and it's one of many things to go wrong. To not go according to plan. You've shed your tears, but at points in time, they come back.
So for the night, you will sit on the edge of your roof and ignore the phone that sits beside you, teetering back and fourth, wondering what would happen if you teetered just a little too far forward...

3 comments:

  1. yes, been there. would not wish it on an enemy, let alone you, my dear friend.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes. It is one of those things that should not have to happen, but it does.
    Thank you, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Who are you? :(
    People tell me I'm a nice guy. I've been strong all my life. But even my friends leave me in the end. I read your post and went into tears. Men have feelings too.

    ReplyDelete